Doubt
by nebula2
Summary: After being rescued from the Believers, Reid takes some time to reflect on his feelings during the ordeal. This story is post episode "300".


**_AN: So, I haven't written much Criminal Minds lately but I finally got around to starting season 14 episodes and after watching the Episode "300" I got the inspiration to write this one shot. Hope you all enjoy it._**

 _Disclaimer: Criminal Minds and its characters do not belong to me._

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Spencer Reid had silently been watching the familiar scenes of his commute home pass by outside the car he rode in. Thankfully, the driver of the car hadn't attempted to engage him in any small chat. It was one of the things he appreciated about Luke - the guy understood that not every moment had to be filled with words. Sometimes, just not being alone was all that was needed.

As the car came to a stop outside of his apartment building though, Spencer knew that the time for silence had come to an end. Not only would getting out of the car without saying anything be rude, but it would also only concern his teammate and assure that Luke would either follow him up to his apartment or would send one of the others.

Looking away from the apartment building, Spencer glanced over at Luke. "I appreciate the lift home."

"No problem," Luke replied. "I told you before that I'd be happy to give you a ride home whenever you want it. Besides, tonight, if I hadn't volunteered to make sure you got home safely, Garcia and JJ would have made it a mission to make work miserable for me for the next weeks."

Spencer gave a forced smile, knowing the truth of Luke's words. "Maybe even months," he added.

"I was trying to be optimistic," Luke replied. "Would you like company going up to your apartment?"

Spencer shook his head, immediately regretting the movement given the bruises that covered his face. "I'll be fine," he said, reaching for the doorhandle.

"Okay, then."

Getting out of the car, Spencer pushed the door shut and headed for his apartment building. He wasn't surprised when he didn't hear the car pull away right away. He had known Luke would at least wait until he was in the building before leaving.

Reaching the building's front door, Spencer looked back toward the waiting car. The streetlight right above the car illuminated Luke who was watching inside. Spencer gave his teammate a quick wave before walking into the building.

Given the late hour, the hallways of the building were empty. Spencer was thankful for this, as he didn't want to answer any questions from concerned neighbors. Reaching his apartment, Spencer let himself in and dropped his messenger bag on the floor. Locking the door and sliding the security chain in place, Spencer crossed over to the couch and sat down on it. Leaning his head back, Spencer closed his eyes.

Tonight had been a close call. Not that he hadn't faced situations like that in the past. There had been too many in his estimation, but it was the risk that came with this job. He had accepted that years ago. Like he had in the past, Reid knew that he would work his way through the aftermath of this case just like he had all the others, some quicker than others. This job was all he knew. His team was his family. That hadn't changed.

What had changed had been his feelings while everything had unfolded. In the past, he had always known that his teammates would find him in time. That he was going to be okay in the end. He hadn't felt that assurance tonight. Not that he hadn't thought his team would come for him. He knew they would. He had known throughout the entire ordeal that Prentis and the others were trying their best to solve the case and locate him and Garcia. That was why he had left the clues for them to follow.

This time though, he had wondered if they would be able to follow those clues fast enough to save him. While he had known his captors would eventually be apprehended, he hadn't known whether he would live to see it happen.

It was a doubt that he couldn't share with the others. Spencer didn't want them thinking that he doubted them in anyway.

Spencer even knew what the difference was this time around - Morgan was not there. In the past, he had always known that Morgan would find him in time. He had never doubted that ever since the case in Alabama during his probation period. Morgan had come through for him then. He had been there for him following the incident and hadn't ever teased him about his reaction to that ordeal.

After that, Spencer had never doubted that Morgan would find him in time when anything happened, and his friend had never let him down since then.

But Morgan hadn't been with the team tonight. Spencer hadn't had that reassurance when he was standing there in front of the cult, bound and unable to move. He knew the team would eventually show up, but until he had actually spotted Luke, he had wondered if they would get there on time.

They had though, Spencer told himself for about the hundredth time. He had been rescued and the perpetrators either killed or arrested. He was safe. Garcia was safe.

Yet somehow he didn't feel safe.

A knock at the door made him jump. Opening his eyes, he got to his feet, wondering if perhaps Luke had decided to make sure he had gotten to his apartment safely after all. Walking cautiously toward the door, Spencer found himself hoping that was the case.

Reaching the door, Spencer looked through the peephole. It was not Luke standing out in the hallway after all, but the person was a welcomed sight anyway. Reaching out, he quickly undid the locks and opened the door.

"What are you doing here?"

"JJ called and told me what happened, Kid," Morgan replied, seemingly unfazed by the unorthodox greeting. "I figured you decline any of the others' offers of company and I didn't want you to be alone after what you went through tonight."

"You didn't have to."

"I know, but I wanted to," Morgan informed him. "So, are you going to let me in or do I hang out in the hallway all night drawing attention."

Spencer flushed as he stepped aside so that Morgan could enter the apartment. Once again, Spencer secured the door and then turned to look at his friend. There were so many things he wanted to tell his friend, but Spencer just couldn't seem to find the words.

That didn't seem to matter to Morgan though as the former FBI agent simply opened his arms to his friend. Without a word, Spencer stepped into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Morgan and his friend did the same thing.

For the first time since he had faced Meadows in the parking garage, Spencer felt safe. Once again, Morgan had kept his promise to always be there no matter where life took them. The brotherly embrace echoed the words that were said in Alabama so many years ago - " _You're safe. I've got you."_ Reid had never forgotten those words, nor had he ever doubted that if Morgan was there things were going to work out in the end.

"Thank-you," Spencer said quietly, though he made no move to pull away.

"Anytime, Kid," Morgan assured him, still holding tight to his younger friend. He planed on letting Spence make the first move to end the embrace. "Anytime."


End file.
